My Pie Crust is Life.

Do you want to make a great pie crust. I used a period there because this really isn’t a question. Of course you do. So do these things I’m telling you to do here:

Get all these things:

2 cups flour

1 tablespoon sugar

1 teaspoon salt

6 tablespoons of chilled butter (cut into small pieces)

6 tablespoons of chilled Crisco (yes, Crisco. yes, the brand matters.)

Pour that flour into a big ass bowl. Put the sugar and salt in next. mix that up with a whisk.

Add 3 tablespoons of butter, and 3 tablespoons of Crisco .

Use a pastry knife to cut the butter into the flour. If you don’t have one, open up the drawer and get the whisk back out and use that. It’s pretty much the same thing. They’re both curvy metal things. You’ll be fine

Here’s the tricky part, champ: You can NOT touch the fats (butter/Crisco) with your fingers. I know we’ve all got some ancient auntie that makes crust by crumbling the fat up with some flour-dipped fingers, and it’s awesome. I know.

But fuck that. This is better.

Once the flour looks crumbly, repeat the technique with the remaining butter and Crisco. You should have a bowl of small pebbles of varying sizes by…